Being an adult is hard. We can all accept that, right? There are some cool things about being an adult too though. Like the fact that I can make a cake and eat it whenever the hell I want to without getting in trouble. I mean, I might pay for it later on the scale, but I certainly won’t have an adultier adult yelling at me for it either.

But the other part of being an adult that is a hard thing to face is the realization that maybe you don’t need to fit in with everyone else. Most of school is designed to groom you to fit in with the others. Play sports, join organizations, and so on. Some schools have uniforms and others have dress codes that even some of the more professional jobs I have held don’t rival. I can dress a lot more comfortably as an adult than I could in high school.

So the veil lifts and you realize you don’t really need to fit in or act a certain way, now what? I have been an “adult” for a little while now. I even have a small clone of myself that I waited quite a while to create. But it wasn’t until I was in my mid to late twenties that I realized, I don’t actually give a shit what people think anymore. I just needed to let my true self free to the full extent.

Here’s the other thing, being yourself is sometimes still pretty hard. Once you realize you can stop faking it till you make it and just embrace your inner you, you still have to face your own impostor syndrome and unease in your own skin to face too. You know what really makes it a lot easier? The Internet. The beautiful thing about the Internet is that you can find people just like parts of yourself and bond and feel welcome.

I write. I read. I love dark humor. I am sarcastic. I like dark clothes. I am considered weird by some people, totally normal by others. I am a gamer. I am trying to embrace all the little parts of me that make me me, even when it hurts. Even when it feels like I am just an impostor in a crowd of people I have deceived. Even when I everyone else thinks I am a bit odd. Always.